By Marion Filler
The clock is ticking for John Mongey, 55, of Morristown, as he searches for a new kidney.
A member of the Mongey family, owners of the Dublin Pub — a fixture in town since 1973 — Mongey was diagnosed with hypertension at 23. Until recently, he assumed it was under control.
Then, just last September, at his father’s funeral, sister Christine O’Rourke noticed how poorly her brother was looking.
“What’s wrong with you, you look completely bloated,” she recalled saying, while urging him to see a doctor. When he finally went to the hospital to be examined, Mongey was told if he had waited two more days he would have died.
“It was John being John, thinking it can’t be that bad. Men!” said O’Rourke.
Since then, Mongey has had a stroke and been on dialysis three times every week. The treatment lasts for three hours and he starts at 5:30 a.m. so he can get to work on time. Recently, a port was inserted into his abdomen for dialysis at home, treatment that takes four hours.
Despite the fatigue and stress that accompanies dialysis, Mongey has a full time position at the Fusion Insurance Group. A divorced father of two, he struggles to maintain normalcy with his children Brooklyn, 11 and Cassidy, 8.
“I have two beautiful daughters that are my life” said Mongey, his voice breaking.
Hypertension and diabetes run in the Mongey family, which makes members ineligible as donors. So the search is on for an alternative source.
Family friend Maureen Hyland Byrne, a teacher at Assumption School, is helping to navigate. In 2021, in the midst of the pandemic, Byrne donated her kidney to a medical assistant she met at the chemotherapy center where her husband was being treated.
“He was wonderful to us and the other patients,” said Byrne, who had a successful and gratifying experience. “I wish I had another to give.” She welcomes any questions about the process and can be reached here.
According to O’Rourke, doctors have said the average wait time for a kidney is between three and five years. Mongey is listed at Cooperman Barnabas Medical Center and linked to a QR code for anyone who might want to donate. Scanning the code will bring up a questionnaire to determine eligibility.
Hackensack Meridian Health is in the loop and other hospials soon will follow. Morristown and Overlook medical centers do not have transplant facilities.
Mongey grew up in Morristown and attended Bayley-Ellard High School in Madison. “I worked off and on in the Dublin Pub, like we all did when we were growing up, waiting on tables, behind the bar, making burgers back in the day when the kitchen was open till 1 o’clock,” he said.
His family and community have rallied round, helping keep his spirits up through the ordeal.
Mongey is optimistic and fighting to survive for his daughters. Looking to the future, he just completed a seven-week course of study for an insurance license examination.
“Dialysis is no joke, but it’s not a death sentence and maybe I’ll get the opportunity for a kidney,” he said.
When he does, the party at the Dublin Pub undoubtedly will be one to remember.
What do I have to do to find out if I’m a match .. ??
More information on organ donation, and specifically kidney donation, is available here. Some time ago, I wrote a column here that features my own grandson, Paul, who made an anonymous donation at the time. Readers might want to take a read as there are good sources. I think it’s important for people to know that even if they aren’t a match, they can donate and ‘trigger’ a chain of donations/matches that will bring a kidney to the person they are seeking to deliver.
Unfortunately, I would be ineligible to donate. However, I will most certainly share this for you. Best of luck!