And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.– The Beatles
Food is love. — Anonymous
By Kevin Coughlin
Chef Melody McGinley Whitelaw, Morristown’s “Caterer to the Stars,” was remembered on Saturday as a zesty and indomitable radio personality, a trail-blazing entrepreneur and caring mentor, and a loving sister and devoted friend.
Melody, who was 68, passed away in February after a second stroke. Her ashes were buried with those of her husband, Bob Whitelaw, who died in 2013, in the memorial garden of St. Peter’s Episcopal Church in Morristown during a weekend service.
A frequent guest chef on WOR radio, Melody’s celebrity clients included Donald Trump, the Rolling Stones and Shaquille O’Neal. She catered private functions for Morris County’s elite, and donated her time and treats to countless charity and civic events, including the MorristownGreen.com Film Festival.
Excitedly, she was preparing for a huge Super Bowl party at the Meadowlands when her first stroke confined her to a wheelchair.
Friends pulled off that gig in Melody’s absence, at some personal peril: Her business van had faulty brakes, but it was too late to get another vehicle cleared by the Super Bowl security people.
“We look back to that trip to the Super Bowl as Melody’s swan song. I feel very proud we took Mel to the Super Bowl,” Doris Lustusky said at a memorial celebration that was a reflection of the eclectic holiday parties Melody loved to host at her business on Washington Street.
“Her company was The Main Event, and she was the main event at all of her gatherings,” said a woman who fondly remembered a milestone birthday party Melody catered for her nearly three decades ago.
A champion whistler, Joe Sodano, paid tribute by whistling Amazing Grace. Another friend, Maggie Maguire, a nurse, recited the Hopi Prayer of the Soul’s Graduation.
Video: Joe Sodano, who often whistled for Melody, performs one more song
Mikael Salovaara, the pastoral associate who conducted the service, praised Melody’s “lightness of being,” and her compassion “even for caregivers who perhaps were indifferent” during her 16-month odyssey through hospitals, rehab centers and nursing homes.
Mourners included Morristown Council President Rebecca Feldman and Councilwoman Alison Deeb, who proposed creation of cooking classes to teach healthy nutrition to young people, an idea inspired by Melody’s Kids Green Kitchen program.
Other acquaintances described Melody, co-founder of the Morristown Women in Business, as “larger than life,” “often dramatic,” “industrious,” “a feminist,” a “mathematical wizard” and — owing to her Southern California roots — a “car gal” who only half-jokingly proposed strapping a souped-up engine to her wheelchair, so she might attend the New York Auto Show.
Equally intriguing were stories of how these friendships were struck. One woman cited a chance encounter on the Morristown Green, where she was walking her Westie — the terrier breed that Melody bred.
Brian Strell said he noticed Melody’s “big hair” when they kept passing in the aisles at Target one day in 2012. The timing was fortuitous: Strell was just starting to overcome cognitive and emotional trauma from a near-fatal shooting by robbers two years earlier. He began doing chores for Melody and accompanying her on visits to her husband Bob, who was hospitalized after his own stroke.
“She helped bring me back into the world,” Strell said of Melody. “You can’t ask for a better friend than that.”
Melody’s younger brother, Tim, who traveled from California with his wife Andrea, confirmed many of the stories that became part of his sister’s legend over the years.
As a freshman cheerleader at UCLA, Melody befriended a shy Lew Alcindor (now known as Kareem Abdul-Jabbar). She also was pals with Herb Alpert of Tijuana Brass fame, and really did party at Elvis’ place with her boyfriend, Richard Shoff of The Sandpipers (Guantanamera, Come Saturday Morning).
‘EVERYTHING WE DID WAS FUN’
Tim McGinley also shared memories of a big sister, eight years his senior, who brought him a milk shake from her first job.
“She did that through her whole life. She brought people food and made them happy,” he said, fighting back tears.
She took him on his first road trip, to San Francisco.
“Everything we did was fun,” the brother said.
Melody bought him his first car. When he paid her back the entire $300, “She said, ‘Look at this, I’ve got money!’–and she took us out to dinner to celebrate.”
For a few years, they had season tickets at Dodger Stadium. Melody had a habit of feeding all of Section 51 … causing such a commotion that Vin Scully, the great broadcaster, once mentioned it on the air, Tim McGinley recounted.
With awe, he also recollected a Melody speech about market research at the L.A. Convention Center in the early 1970s, when it still was fairly uncommon for women to land prominent public speaking assignments. She inspired him to become successful in business, he said.
“If you want it bad enough, you can do it,” Tim McGinley said, quoting his sister. “She showed me a great work ethic. There’s no excuse for hard work. You can’t complain. No. Work hard enough, you can get it.”
When he attended his 40th high school reunion, former classmates bombarded him with questions about how his sister was doing.
Melody had chaperoned their graduation night trip to Disneyland. She gave everyone a goodie bag. Forty years later, they remembered.
In that same spirit, everyone was sent home Saturday with a gift to cherish:
An apron from Melody’s kitchen.
Melody McGinley Whitelaw also is survived by a son, Shay; a sister, Patricia; two granddaughters, one great-grandson and five nieces.
MORE ABOUT CHEF MELODY McGINLEY WHITELAW
