Lawyers tell clients it’s always smart to sign a pre-nup before marching down the aisle.
It’s not a bad idea to have a pre- pre-nup, either, if you’re shacking up before tying the knot.
That’s the word from Wynne Whitman, one of the “featured conversationalists” at last week’s Great Conversations benefit for Morris Arts.
“It just clarifies everything,” said Wynne, who happens to be an estate lawyer and co-author of Shacking Up–The Smart Girl’s Guide to Living in Sin Without Getting Burned.
She was one of 29 featured dinner speakers at the Madison Hotel. Some 270 people came to the $200-per-ticket fundraiser for an opportunity to dine and chat with movers and shakers (and shackers?) from the worlds of business, entertainment, politics and sports.
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Angela Liu, a former chemist who runs a health-snack business, was delighted to break bread with State Climatologist David Robinson. Discussion, naturally, revolved around the weather. Angela insisted all that talk about climate change did not scare her.
“I don’t have beachfront property,” she said with a grin. Besides, she added, “I think technology will find a way to get us out of trouble.”
Donna McNamara, who appeared in a recent documentary for Family Service of Morris County, learned that even famous opera stars sing in the shower. At least, that’s what bass/baritone Mark Delavan told Donna’s table.
Indeed, some of the guests would have made fascinating speakers. Joe “The Bird Man” Sodano, for example, is appearing on New York talk shows after winning an award at the International Whistlers Convention.
Our readers may recall the Morristown native’s second place finish in the 2010 Morristown’s Got Talent contest; check out Joe’s video explanation of why he is known as “Poultry in Motion.”
STAR-STRUCK
Tom Werder was among the star-struck on Thursday. Overseeing his first Great Conversations gala since becoming Morris Arts executive director last year, Tom shared a table with Finn Wentworth, co-founder of the YES Network and partner in the New York Yankees.
“I tried on his World Series ring!” Tom gushed.
Rings also were a hot topic at our table; we were counseled to lawyer up before even thinking about wearing them. In romantic settings, anyway.
Co-habitation agreements just make sense, Wynne Whitman said. Living together no longer raises eyebrows; senior citizens are shacking up in droves, she said.
Yet casual arrangements can get sticky. Suppose your “significant other” gets hit by a bus. How long can you stay in your shared apartment?
What if your late flame wanted you to have a precious keepsake that his parents also covet?
“The biggest thing is communicating,” said Wynne, who co-wrote Shacking Up in 2003 with her sister, who was moving in with a boyfriend who became her husband.
Without spelling things out on paper, up front, “you’re heading down the road to heartbreak or financial hardship,” cautioned Wynne, an attorney for Schenk, Price, Smith & King in Florham Park, and the author of several financial planning guides.
Which brings us to the other cardinal rule for successful sinning.
“Never commingle your money,” Wynne said.
